Bridezilla to Birthzilla
The other day I read an article that totally wound me up. It was referring to some birthing women as Birthzillas and saying how they make health professionals jobs tough.
Now there were so many things that got me mad! I mean the term itself- Birthzilla!!! What are they referring to? Women who have preferences? Women who want this to be a great experience? Women who want more than JUST a healthy baby?
But also, when women are birthing their babies (a pretty big deal)- they shouldn’t be expected to make anyone’s job less tough!
Based on their definitions I was definitely a Birthzilla and before that I was certainly a Bridezilla!
When I was getting married in 2011 I was beyond excited! My focus was on what a great and beautiful day this was going to be. A memory to cherish forever. I spent every bit of my spare time researching and getting ideas for this day that we would remember for the rest of my life. I wanted the flowers to be incredible, my dress to be dreamy, the venue to be stunning, the music to be romantic. I did everything in my power to make that happen. I was not going to settle for anything less.
Did this mean I was more interested in an incredible day than a wonderful marriage?
Of course not! Of course a healthy marriage was top priority. The focus on building a memorable day does not mean I wasn’t interested in a healthy marriage. One doesn’t have to come without the other.
And the same goes for birth. You can want a healthy happy baby AND a positive birth experience.
When I was pregnant (all three times) I wanted a great birth. I wanted an experience that I could look back on happily. Like the wedding that came before I did the research, I knew what choices I had, what environment I wanted, what tools I wanted to use. I knew what was important to me and I did everything in my power to make that more likely. I was also willing to invest in things that would make these things more possible. I knew it would never be a waste.
Now I was well aware that there are some things that were beyond my control. I knew very well that sometimes birth can go on a different path to what you wanted. BUT I always knew that whatever happened the preparation and my confidence in my ability to make choices would always make a difference.
You can want a beautiful birth and a healthy baby
You can want a beautiful wedding and a wonderful marriage
One does not have to come without the other! Of course it doesn’t.
This is your birth. You will remember how it made you feel for the rest of your life. You deserve it to be the best possible experience for you. This might look differently to how you imagined, but having high expectations, taking steps to help it be a more positive experience will always make a difference. If this makes you a ‘Birthzilla’ then good on you!
A Hypnobirthing course will prepare you so well for your baby’s birth showing you ways that you can prepare for a great experience. It will help you let go of the stuff that might not be in your control and focus on the stuff you can. Birth can be positive, empowering and even beautiful. Drop me a message to find out more about my courses.